my mom

cute mom
june
mom and dad, my brother tom and me
my mom was the best mom ever...i'm so lucky that she brought me up and taught me wonderful things...it's been 12 years since she passed away and i've missed her daily...she was one of my morning calls...i told tom when we moved to california that i was going to be calling my mom, alot! and i did (that was when long distance cost alot).....she was my champion...she gave me great advice, she taught me how to clean, cook, tried to teach me to sew...she gave me a love of beautiful things..she was also a really beautiful woman, but would have been embarrassed if you said that and she was so much fun, she loved to hear my dad's jokes...she was a very talented person but had so much humility..... my mom taught me what it was to love...i know that she loved me with all her heart...i just hope that i have done the same for my kids...my mom gave me a great legacy...one that i'm so proud to be apart of...and hopefully, it will be passed on to my kids, grandkids etc...thanks mom...you're the greatest!

For My Valentines

It doesn't matter if it's a gift like this


Or a gift like this
Or one like this...it just matters what's in your heart....

Happy Valentines to all my loves....


There is no remedy for love but to love more.
~Henry David Thoreau


Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.
~ Franklin P. Jones


To laugh often and love much... to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to give one's self... this is to have succeeded.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson


A heart that loves is always young.
~ by A Greek Proverb ~

it might not be the Matterhorn, but it felt like it!

shawn, kelly and kerry
kerry and dan (he's the leader and russ' best friend)


on saturday i had one of the biggest physical challenges that i've done for many, many years...the plan was to climb mt. boney and scatter my brother in law's ashes on one of his favorite sites...i was not going to go at first, thought i would stay home and tend the babies...but, then i thought, i should go in uncle russ' memory...i've climbed halfway up in early years...way earlier...but, i thought, i can do this..so we ( me, my kids, kelly and jeff, russ and kerry, my sister in law, reilley and her son shawn and our friend danny) started off at 6 am...it had rained the night before, it was muddy, slick, dark...when the light came it was foggy and misty, which turned out great, because it was cool...so, we walked and hiked and climbed on and on...i was at the end of the group...way far away from the rest...wondering if i was on the right trail, thinking what have i done...i will be wandering forever...FINALLY, after hours of hiking we got to the top...then, we walked down the ridge a bit to this ledge, that i guess on a clear day you can see the ocean...that's where we scattered the ashes...it was a special moment to think of him and rembember his life..then we started down on the SHORTCUT, wow, what a way to go...it was down the face of the mountain...sliding down slick mossy rock, crumbly rock (i'm thinking, where is willie? he's the one that likes to rock climb..alas, he and kelly k couldn't come), at one point it was the rock on one side and poison oak on the other...so i was clinging to the rock....and boy did my thighs hurt..and my toes!!!! .then, you get off the face....and you still have to hike out!!! from this outting i learned many things....the main one is...just keep putting one foot in front of the other...just as in life...sometimes it's better to not look up and see the big picture..just keep those feet moving...you can't give up...so, no matter how long it takes (in my case 8 and1/2 hours), you have to do it...you have to endure to the end..you might fall or stumble...but, you have to pick yourself up again and keep walking...life is like this hike, we sometimes can run up the mountain (my kids, not me) and sometimes we trudge (me), but, we all get there...sometimes you need help from others (russ and kelly helped me alot coming down), you sometimes give help along the way ( not me, i just took alot of help)....we all need encouragement and love (everyone kept giving me ALOT of encouragement)..and in the end....it is all worth it!!! when you accomplish something that is so far out of your realm(this was it for me)...it makes you really proud of yourself....and you can think of that when the next hurdle comes along.... so for all of you out there...trudging along the path....just keep moving those feet...one step at a time!!!

torture time

tom and marty plotting even then
didn't think those sweet faces had it in them
waiting for me to show up to tease
wishing for a new sister to tease
you'd never know by looking at them, they look so sweet!


i was reading my niece gabi's blog and she mentioned my sister and brother and how they used to tease me...brought back aloooooot of memories...being the youngest in a family of 4 kids made me the obvious target....and they sure did....i think i cried and cried and cried as a kid...to this day when kids are teasing others it sort of "sends" me....but, on the other hand...it made me tough after about 20 years...and then i got a new teaser.....tom! some of the more memorable times were....being told that i had an orange head...it was the back of my head and of course if i looked in a mirror...it would not be there...my brother tom, pointing his finger at me and laughing silently...even when he did it under the table...i knew he what he was doing....and i would cry...then, when we did the dishes, he would whip me with the wet towels...polly had "torture time"....that was when i got to smell her feet for a 100 years....or be tickled for another 100 years..another fun time was when they all wrapped me in alot of different blankets and i had to find my way out...the thing of it is.....i went along with it..i was pretty naive..i know i cried...but, i also let them do it....i think i knew that even though they were teasing, that they loved me...it wasn't malicious....it was what kids seem to do to other kids....we often show our love in a not so loving way...and it seems to be a built in trait....just the other day...gavin was doing something to owen and kelly said, that owen has learned to cry even before gavin does anything to bug him....i know the kids are home when i hear kerry yell "RUSSELLLLL" in a not so happy way....but it is that tortureous love that makes a close in a way that we all seem to love...i used to tell the kids that when they were teased by other kids especially ones of the opposite sex that it was probably because that person liked them.....so hopefully we can all deal with our "torture times" and realize that they are just showing their love for us...(and i know that you guys (m,t, and p) loved me enough to tease)......so, who did you used to tease and torture?